Despite the bleak statistics regarding Black women and marriage, many Black women still refuse to date non-Black men. Looking back on my own experience refusing to date non-Black guys for years (admittedly after a slew of white and Latino boyfriends), there are a plethora of reasons we tell ourselves for why we should hold out for our Black Prince Charmings. Now that I’m with my own Luscious Latin, I have to say that I am a BIG FAN of Black women stepping out to love whomever makes their heart sing.
I’ll share my top 20 list of reasons why I think so many Black women won’t date non-Black men (in the order they occurred to me).
- We’ll have to convince the guy that racism exists.
- The sex won’t be good.
- People will look at us crazy in public and judge us.
- He won’t understand Black Hair.
- We’ve accomplished so much and worked so hard. We deserve to be with a Black man.
- We’ll have to be politically correct around him.
- Our kids won’t look like us.
- His family won’t embrace us.
- Our family won’t embrace him.
- While we’re dating the non-Black guy, we’ll miss out on our Black Prince Charming.
- We don’t want to be someone’s fetish or experiment.
- He won’t be able to dance.
- He won’t be comfortable eating our food.
- He’ll date us but he won’t marry us.
- He doesn’t share our religious background.
- He won’t share our humor.
- We won’t be able to bring him around our friends.
- He’ll go bald and look weird.
- He’ll embarrass us in front of Black people.
- He’ll prove to us that our notions of the perfect coupledom are a fallacy.
Girls, why do you think so many Black women refuse to date non-Black men? And what advice do you have for our single Black sisters who are considering it?